Tell Me What I'll Never Be, Make Me Feel Broken

I've set some very specific goals for myself. By September I should be at my ultimate goal weight. I thought that was a very reasonable amount of time. I have quite a bit of weight to lose but it doesn't take long at all. I need to get my shit together and step back from Bulimia. I want to know what it's like to have everything I've ever wanted. I need to cross that border into Anorexia. I've tiptoed in and out of the habits now and then, but I need to commit to it. I'm so ready.